When I was 22, my boyfriend Mike and I went to go see an Astrologer together to have our charts read. It was an unusually fascinating experience. It wasn't a reading into the future and fortune telling of what was to come in our lives at all. Instead it was a looking back at the alignments that occurred at our births (based on the date, exact time and birth city) that then brought certain events into our lives.
Sounding wacky and out there for some of you? Well maybe, but what the astrologer did share with me rocked my boat. She proposed that your parents don't choose you, you choose your parents. It was a funny thing to hear, especially because birth, from a medical perspective seems like something that your parents made happen (if we're talking consummation.) So this concept twisted my thinking at first. But she went on to explain that in astrology, its considered that you chose the members of your family, they didn't just happen to you. This certainly rattles any teenage angst of being pissed at your mom and dad for being your parents and bringing you into this world. It sure puts the responsibility back over here with me, when I try on this perspective.
She went on to explain that you chose the people that you did to learn the lessons you need to in this lifetime and they are the people you learn them with.
When she looked at my chart, she pointed to some aspects within the different planets and said "You see your father as both parents." I turned my head sideways at her for a moment and gawked. How could this have been written in the stars on the day I was born and then come to pass without my conscious knowledge only to have this woman telling me something that was so blatantly true about my life? Well to be honest, I still haven't figured the answer to it out and have instead surrendered it to the mysteries of the universe.
I do, did then, and have always seen my father as both parents (even though I grew up with my mom and dad together under the same roof until I was 16). My dad is my knight in shining armour. He quite simply is the most generous, patient and giving man I have ever met. When it comes to his two daughters there is nothing he won't do for us, he is a 'Yes Man' through and through.
My dad made sure that we had everything we needed to make our dreams come true. After breaking my leg at 16 and my parents splitting up all in the same summer, I finally decided I needed to return to dance because I needed my creative outlet. Minus his huge financial set back due to my parents separating, he put together a budget in a heartbeat and I was back in ballet class training 5 days a week in a matter of weeks.
People often say that my sister and I must have grown up in a really artsy household since we both have careers in the arts. I laugh when they do because my dad is a mechanical engineer and my eyes still glaze over to this day when he rattles on about his work because I just can't seem to wrap my brain around all the math, numbers, measurements and preciseness. I do however, find extreme joy in watching him get super excited over his work. So my answer to people is that my dad was an example that you do what you love. He went to work every day elated to get there and start solving the next problem. At home my favorite memory of him was him sitting at his drafting table, happily puzzling over a problem while drawing precise lines with that magical table. It wasn't even a question from what I saw growing up, you simply do what you love.
Now match that with my mom's fiery persistence and value that you never give up on anything ever, and you have two daughters that pursued their dreams in their chosen passions.
The astrologer also pointed out that my dad and I are very similar and see things the same way and that we have a very similar energy and way of being. I have always felt this unexplainable affinity to my dad, like we just know and understand each other without words.
My dad used to be an avid skier before my sister and I were born. And he pretty much put his mountain time aside when he began to raise two little girls who needed to be driven from Langley into the city for ballet classes, voice lessons and musical theatre multiple times per week. About 5 years ago he came home from work one day and said, "Meredith, I'm going to go up the mountain and ski." I was a little shocked as it had been 30 years since he'd spoken about skiing but told him to go have fun. He picked himself up a pair of skis from a garage sale and was gone for the day. When he came back he said, "That was awesome, but everyone is on snowboards now, and I've got to try it." And so, after a 30 year hiatus from the mountain he returned to the slopes and taught himself how to snowboard by watching YouTube videos!
On Sunday June 15, 2014 when we celebrate our fathers and thank them for who they have been to us. I say thank you to my dad, my hero, the guy who can do anything and who would give the shirt off his back just to make sure someone else had what they needed. I would by no means be the person I am today without you in my life.
Dad, I am glad I chose you!
My father, Eugene and I.
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